


I'm Jealous

by RavenBlackwing



Series: Dead Letters [1]
Category: The Rasmus
Genre: F/M, Fluff, One Shot, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-10
Updated: 2014-06-10
Packaged: 2018-02-04 03:31:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1764191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenBlackwing/pseuds/RavenBlackwing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hannah muses about Lauri</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Jealous

Title: I’m Jealous 1/1

Author: Raven Blackwing

Rating: PG13 (if that)

Disclaimer: He’s not mine, although I wish he were. I’m just playing; I’ll give him back in one piece (this time). Not making any money out of this.

Special Warnings: RPH, songfic, sap and fluffiness (I’m still blaming the bunnies), Naughty thoughts

Cast: Lauri/OFC 

Timeline: 1st in series.

Summary: Hannah muses about Lauri

 

*~*

I'm Jealous

I watch you; I watch you all the time.

You never notice but then I’m very careful. 

_If I were the moon, I could_  
catch your eye--I'm jealous of the moon  
If I were the wind, I would  
make you fly--I'm jealous of that too 

I can’t say when it started; I think it was a gradual thing. After all we were; are friends, and you watch your friends’ right? Of course, you don’t expect to suddenly find yourself longing for a glimpse, to feel your heart lift at the sight of a smile. That’s when I realised that I wasn’t just watching a friend.

I remember the picnic we had. You had a break from touring so Aki, Eero and Pauli were there; a couple of my friends had come along as well.

It was a beautiful summer’s day, picture book really. An azure blue sky with a few fluffy, white clouds dotted here and there. A light breeze ruffled the verdant leaves and kept the heat from becoming too oppressive.

We all agreed that it was a perfect day for lazing about. Aki suggested we go to the park for lunch so we all pitched in to pack up a hamper.

As it was only a short distance from my place, we decided to walk. I couldn’t help but giggle as I listened to you and Aki bicker like an old married couple.

We had just reached the gate when Aki gave you the ultimate insult

‘Shortarse.’ He clipped you playfully round the head and took off running.

Through the laughter I heard you shout, and watched in amusement as you gave chase, swiftly followed by Pauli, Kate and Melissa.

Eero and I just looked at each other, rolled our eyes and made our way over to the shade under an oak tree to start setting up the picnic. 

After a few minutes Pauli and Kate joined us. As they flopped to the ground they were still laughing at you and Melissa, still running manically after Aki, who was doing an admirable job of avoiding capture.

I leant back against the trunk of the tree and closed my eyes for a moment. Eero, Pauli and Kate were talking softly, but it was enough to mask the sound of your approach.

Suddenly I felt something cold and sticky drop on my nose. My eyes shot open to find your laughing green eyes staring into mine. I reached up to my nose but you caught my hand and stopped me. Your fingers were covered in the whipped cream I’d bought for the strawberries.

I raised one eyebrow at you; you grinned back and slowly leaned in. Swiftly your tongue swept over my nose, cleaning the cream away.

‘Ewww, Lauri stop,’ I laughed.

I tried to push you away. You wouldn’t let me, instead you moved in again, trying to nibble the end of my nose.

I shrieked and attempted to pull away but you still gripped my hands. Unable to maintain my balance I toppled sideways pulling you with me.

_I wish I were the sun shining_  
on your face--caressing like a lover  
I would wrap you in a warm embrace--  
we'd be holdin' one another  
(I'm jealous of the sun)  
I'm jealous of the sun  
(Jealous of the sun) Oh,  
I'm jealous of the sun 

Immediately, what can only be described as an evil grin crossed your face. I knew that look. I started to squirm madly, trying to get away.

‘Oh no you don’t missy,’ you crowed, ‘didn’t help me catch Aki, call yourself a friend?’

You straddled my hips and held my hands above my head in one hand while you flexed the fingers of the other menacingly.

‘You have to be punished.’

With that you started to tickle me, you knew all my weak spots and used this to your advantage. Almost straight away you had me screaming with laughter, kicking my legs and pleading with you to stop.

It was Aki who came to my rescue.

‘Leave Hannah alone, Lintu. It’s time to eat,’ my hero said.

Reluctantly you stopped the torture but you still didn’t release me. Instead you leant close to my ear and whispered.

‘Let that be a lesson to you, you’re supposed to be on my side.’ With a sneaky lick of my nose, you freed my hands and rolled off me.

_Oh, I don't wanna share you with_  
nothing else--I gotta have you to myself  
Oh--I can't help it--I'm so in love--  
I just can't get you close enough, no 

I leant back against the tree trunk and saw you flap your t-shirt as Eero handed me a plate of pasta salad.

‘Whew, it’s hot,’ you complained.

‘Well, perhaps you shouldn’t be so energetic,’ I childishly flicked a bit of pasta at you.

Your eyes widened.

‘You’ll pay for that.’ You wagged your finger at me.

I just smiled, but a moment later my smile faltered as you slowly pulled your t-shirt over your head.

‘Stop staring, stop staring, stop staring,’ I chanted the litany in my head as my eyes refused to leave the glorious vision in front of me.

I felt a blush rise and struggled to pull my eyes from your tanned, honed torso. 

‘Much better,’ you said in a satisfied tone, ‘now for my payback.’

You grinned at me, turned round and laid back, with your head in my lap.

I froze. I didn’t know what to do or say. Thankfully you broke the silence.

‘I’m hungry, feed me!’ You demanded.

‘Wh-what,’ I stuttered.

‘Well, if you’re just going to throw food about, you can put it to better use and feed it to me.’ You replied logically.

I just stared at you; your head nestled on my thighs. All I could think was where the hell should I put my hands. 

This time it was Eero who rescued me. Handing me a plate of food for you, he gave me a small smile; I swear that man sees way too much.

Shrugging, I picked up a cube of feta cheese topped with a black olive and handed it to you. You shook your head.

‘No, I said feed me.’

I glared at you and bought the cheese to your lips.

I think I stopped breathing when you closed your lips round my fingers. It had never occurred to me just how sensual it is to feed another person. 

I felt a jolt pass right through my body as your tongue swirled round my fingertips, capturing the last morsel.

‘More?’ Damn, even my voice was betraying me as it came out rather huskily.

I tried to stay calm and continued to feed you but all the while my body was overly sensitive to its proximity to your naked flesh.

Skin with a golden glow, gleaming with a light sweat caused by the heat of the sun. I wanted to touch you so badly my palms were tingling.

As I slipped the last baby tomato between your lips, Eero passed me a bowl of chocolate covered strawberries with the whipped cream piled high next to them. 

Ok maybe he wasn’t my hero after all. He winked at me. Bastard!

I barely suppressed a whimper as, through a haze of lust, I watched your sharp, white teeth bite into the strawberry I held for you. 

I wanted to follow that succulent fruit into your mouth. I wanted to strategically drip whipped cream over your body and lick it off. I wanted to feel the heat of the sun radiating from your skin next to mine. 

I wanted; I wanted… you.

I think that was the first time I realised that my feelings had changed. I knew that I had to keep it secret, couldn’t let you know.

So I watched.

And I was careful.

_When the sun's on your skin--_  
I can't hold it in  
And I know it's a sin--  
but I'm jealous of the sun 

But obviously not careful enough. More than once I caught Eero giving me odd looks, like he was trying to figure something out.

He worked it out eventually, I’m fairly sure the rainstorm gave it away.

Typical British weather, one week blazing sun, the next torrential downpours. It was one of those days; while it was warm, it was wet enough to drown a duck.

So when I heard the doorbell ring I wondered what poor sod had ventured out. The minute the door opened I burst out laughing. 

There you were, hair plastered to your forehead, completely drenched. Aki and Eero were behind you, sheltering under an umbrella.

‘What are you doing?’ I asked when I could breathe again.

‘I’ve been dancing in the rain,’ you replied with a grin, ‘ever tried it?’

With that, you grabbed my arm and pulled me from the shelter of my doorway.

‘Lauri!’ I screamed.

You pulled me into your arms and started twirling around on my driveway. I couldn’t help laughing as I clung to you for support. I was getting soaked but all I could feel was your heat where we were pressed together.

We waltzed up and down the pathway, with you occasionally dipping me low, threatening to drop me in the large puddles that had formed.

The tango took place round the tree in my front lawn. I caught a glimpse of Aki and Eero, who had moved to stand just inside, both watching us with amusement.

As we tap danced our way back to the door you took one of my hands and spun me out, away from your body then rapidly drew me back in. My hair whipped out and wrapped itself round your neck, the water causing it to cling.

You finally stood still, arms wrapped loosely round my waist and smiled down at me

‘See, wasn’t that fun?’ You were laughing at me.

‘Oh yeah, feeling and probably looking like a drowned rat is just great,’ I grumbled breathlessly but I smiled at you to show I didn’t really mean it.

_I wish I were the rain runnin' down your_  
neck--and drippin' from your fingers  
Then I could be the drops rollin' off your  
back--I'd love to let it linger  
(Jealous of the rain) Oh,  
I'm jealous of the rain 

It felt like a herd of butterflies had moved into my stomach as I watched you throw your head back to catch the raindrops on your tongue. 

Without realising, I moved closer, until I was pressed up against you again. With my hands resting on your chest, I felt your nipples harden as your skin chilled. I think I gasped as I became conscious of what my hands were doing. 

Rubbing circles over the fabric of your t-shirt.

It was then that I noticed that you were watching me. I couldn’t meet your piercing gaze, flustered; I pulled away and gave a shiver.

‘I’m cold, we need to go in and dry off.’

I rushed for the doorway, but as I went to move past Aki and Eero, I felt someone grab my arm.

It was Eero. He didn’t say anything, just gave me a look. I should have known that he’d work it out. I just nodded and pulled gently away.

_Oh, I don't wanna share you with nothing_  
else--I gotta have you to myself  
Oh--I can't help it--I'm so in love--  
I just can't get you close enough, no  
When it rains on your face--  
I almost can taste  
Your beauty, your grace--  
I'm jealous of the rain 

I had just changed into some dry clothes and was towelling my hair dry when I heard a knock on my bedroom door. I knew it was him.

 

I took a deep breath and walked over to the door.  
I gave Eero a weak smile as I opened the door and gestured for him to come in. He closed the door behind him as I walked over to the bed and sat down.

‘I know what you’re going to say,’ I started

He nodded.

‘How long have you loved him?’ he asked.

‘It feels like forever,’ I looked up at him with tears in my eyes. ‘But you can’t say anything. He mustn’t find out.’

He sat down next to me and put his arm around my shoulders.

‘Why not?’

‘Because I don’t want to lose him completely.’ I cried

As Eero hugged me, the dam burst. Along with my tears, all the feelings I had kept inside me came flooding out. 

_When the wind's in your hair—_  
(I can feel it blowing)  
the way it blows through the air  
(It’s so unfair)  
Oh, it's seems so unfair, yeah 

How I loved to watch the wind blow through your hair and how I wished it was my fingers instead. The way I so wanted to caress you in the same way the moonlight did, gliding gently over your skin, pressing kisses to the shadowed places. The dreams I’d been having recently that had me waking up aching and crying for your touch.

Through all this, Eero just held me, silently telling me that I wasn’t alone. As my tears abated he finally spoke.

‘You need to tell him, you can’t just keep this locked inside you.’ 

But I was already shaking my head.

‘I’ll get over it, I’m sure it’s just a silly crush.’ I didn’t sound very convincing, even to myself.

Eero shook his head in exasperation.

‘You shouldn’t keep it contained, you need to find some way of getting it out.’

‘I know,’ I replied sadly ‘I’ll think about it.’

‘Ok, you do that. I promise not to say anything; for now.’ With that Eero stood up and walked to the door.

‘I think Lintu wants to go dance some more, so we’ll be going shortly,’ He smiled. ‘Will you be ok?’

I nodded. I had some thinking to do.

 

_When the moon's in your eyes--_  
you seem to light up the skies, yeah  
And I realize--  
I'm even jealous of the moon 

 

End

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s notes: 
> 
> These are old fics, really old, so the writing style may not be fabulous
> 
> Alternate song for this would be – Can’t Take My Eyes Off You by Andy Williams 
> 
> Archived here: http://adultfan.nexcess.net/aff/authors.php?no=13499


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